Wedding Toasts are one of our favorite wedding traditions — we love learning a little bit more about the couple, especially from an insider’s perspective. Although we are sure we can all agree that we have been to our fair share of weddings where the Best Man has had a few too many beers before his toast, or the Maid of Honor has decided to take us through all 20 years of their friendship, you can cue the tears when the toasts begin. However, cringing through wedding toasts has been the number one reason a lot of couples have decided to ditch this tradition entirely.

While most people are resorting to toasts at the rehearsal dinner or more intimate gatherings, we want to keep them around at the reception. As wedding coordinators, we have heard many, many, fails, but also many great successes. Being behind the scenes has allowed us to pick up a few tips to help you through writing the best toast.

Congratulations and Relations.

While starting with a joke may sometimes be funny, it isn’t always the best way to start your toast. Congratulating the couple is the perfect way to set the scene. You can then address your relationship with the bride or groom, such as how you met, or how you are related. It is also important to remember other guests and how they are related to the bride & groom. If you have to ask yourself “is this appropriate?”, at all during your speech, it probably isn’t. It is best to keep it clean and keep the embarrassing topics out.

Anecdotes, Quotes, & Inside Jokes.

Having a theme to your anecdotes is a great way to avoid getting long-winded. Zero in on one to three short memories and stories that compliment or showcase attributes of the person you are toasting. Jokes just between the two of you never go over well with the crowd and don’t get your point across. Referencing quotes is a great way to tie a theme to your stories and anecdotes to make it intentional. !

Raise your glass.

In closing, be sure to reference back and note how their new spouse compliments an attribute you mentioned and how that will help them to succeed in their future. Wish the couple well, and be sure to invite everyone to raise their glass to toast to the newlyweds.

Now that you know the basics, here are a few questions we found on Brides.com to ask yourself to help you get started writing that killer wedding toast.